Being "out of your depth" is a preemptive excuse used by people who are afraid of failing. It's a fear-based mechanism to let everyone know that your current situation is new and challenging for you and you might suck at it and you want everyone to be prepared for that. Except it's bullshit.

When failure means death

If you were really swimming and went out of your depth then failure means drowning. In this literal sense failure while being out of your depth can result in death. Now that's a serious negative consequence.

But when in your life does being "out of your depth" mean that you might literally die from failure?

That new job you took? Giving a speech? Running your own business? Playing a new sport?

Nope. For most of life's experiences being out of your depth will not kill you.

Don't worry about the depth

Depth is not even the real issue. Once you go past the point where your feet can no longer touch the ground depth becomes irrelevant. It could be 2 metres or 200 metres deep. Either way you still have to work hard if you want to keep yourself afloat.

If depth was the real danger then everyone would be happy to just wallow in the dubiously warm, waist deep waters of the kiddies pool. Safe and comfortable. Ahhhhhh.

But the kiddies pool is not nearly as fun as the big pool or, better yet, the wide open beach is it?

The real fun is had out in the deep water.

Worry more about waves and currents

And the real problem is not the deepness of the water water but the dangerousness of it.

A 10 metre deep diving pool with calm water is infinitely safer than a 2 metre ocean with tropical winds whipping up giant waves and creating strong undercurrents that can easily suck you under water mid-breath.

In life these dangers are people, situations, and events that happen around you but outside of your control. They can churn the water around, they try to suck you in, and they can crash down upon you without warning.

But, just like the waves in the ocean, you cannot control these things. You can only choose how you will handle them. Will you remain calm and keep your head above water or will you flail around aimlessly and tire yourself out?

Don't fight against the current

Growing up in Australia I had ample beach experiences and there is one golden rule that is always used when you find yourself getting in to trouble in the water: don't fight against the current.

Why? Because even the best swimmers can be overwhelmed by a strong current and when caught in a dangerous situation it is stupid to waste your precious energy on a futile task that gets you nowhere.

Life is no different. When surrounded by murky and dangerous waters there is little point to spending all your time and effort pushing against them. Instead, realign yourself to use their force and direction to end up somewhere better.

Being out in the deep is fun

Remember this next time you feel "out of your depth" - deep water is where all the fun happens. Surf boards, jet skis, boats, paddle boards, kite surfing, and scuba diving. None of that works in the shallows.

Being out in the deep is fun.